Dildos come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. You can get a big dildo, a mini dildo, a metal or glass dildo, a textured dildo, or even a curved dildo to directly target the g-spot. While many females enjoy dildos for vaginal penetration and g-spot stimulation, you can also get an anal dildo to penetrate the booty and stimulate the nerve endings there. Vibrator You may have heard the buzz that no bedroom is complete without a vibrator of some sort. Well, that’s because these sex toys are designed which the intention of helping you achieve orgasm no matter which part of the body you use it on. A vibrator is an all-encompassing term for any sex toy that vibrates to stimulate erogenous zones of the body. Figuring out which is the best vibrator really comes down to which areas of the body you like to have stimulated. There are external styles that stimulate the clitoris and internal styles which massage the vagina and g-spot. If you want external and internal stimulation at the same time, there is also the rabbit vibrator. This has a vibrating vaginal shaft and external ears which vibrate against the clitoris so you can get the best of both worlds.
Clitoral massager A clitoral massager is one of the top female sex toys you can get when it comes to helping women achieve orgasm. 75% of women need clitoral stimulation to achieve an orgasm and that is exactly what these clit stimulation toys are designed to do. There are all sorts of clitoral vibes available from the large and powerful wand vibrators to the much smaller bullet vibes. These bullets can be used alone or with a partner during sex too as they are small enough to not get in the way. Recently there has also been a rise in toys that mimic oral sex using suction and pulsing waves around the clitoris, rather than vibration alone to bring the user to orgasm. There are a lot of clitoral toys to choose from and the best clitoral vibrator is dependent on what you like and how you want to use the toy. Butt plug
Female sex toys aren’t only targeted at the vulva and the vagina, though. Butt plugs have seen a huge increase in popularity over the past few years as sex toys have become more mainstream. Butt plugs come in varying shapes and sizes and are designed to create a full feeling in the anus. You can wear a butt plug during masturbation or during partnered play to give the body even more sensation as your sphincter muscles tighten around the plug. A lot of people also use butt plugs to prepare their body for anal sex. They are used to relax and stretch the muscles making the entry of a penis or a larger toy easier and more comfortable. You can also look for a vibrating butt plug for even more stimulation to the booty, or even a tail butt plug for animal role play or to look super cute.
Anal beads If you want to explore anal play but a butt plug seems a little intimidating, then another option is to start off with a set of anal beads. Anal beads are a chain of connected spheres starting small and gradually increasing in size. What makes them so great for beginners is that the beads only need to be inserted as far as you feel comfortable with and you will still get all the amazing benefits. That is because anal beads stimulate the nerve endings at the opening of the anus. This area has thousands of nerve endings, much more than the internal canal, and it is the entry and removal of the beads which offers the most pleasure. This is another toy which can be used alone or with a partner during any kind of play. Try slowly removing the beads during or before orgasm as it can make your orgasm feel a whole lot more intense. Nipple clamps The nipple tends to be one of the erogenous zones of the body that is often overlooked by sex toy users. This is because nipple clamps are commonly associated with pain rather than pleasure. And while this can be the case in some instances, it all comes down to which type of clamp you are using. Nipple clamps work by pinching the nipples and restricting blood flow to the area. If tugged on when being worn, this can cause some pain (which of course, some people will love), but their main purpose is actually the effect when the clamps are removed.
Chastity Belt VibratorOnce removed from the body, the blood is able to return to the nipple creating a rush of sensation and endorphins. After removal the nipple will be more sensitive and responsive to touching, licking, or pinching. If you are new to nipple clamps, look for a style that is adjustable so you can find the level of pressure you like. Tweezer clamps, alligator clamps, or butterfly clamps are all adjustable styles that are ideal for beginners. Handcuffs While most female sex toys can also be used with a partner, there are toys that are designed specifically for this too. Handcuffs are a great entry toy for those starting to get into sex toys and bondage play. Handcuffs are restraint toys for attaching two wrists together or attaching a wrist to something else like a bedpost or chair to restrain movement and the ability to touch from the wearer. The point of this style of toy is to remove the wearer’s ability to touch or move and heighten the rest of the sensitivity on their body. It is also a great way to ease into power play and explore dominant and submissive roles in a relationship.
Other sex toys for women The above are some of the top-rated female sex toys but there are still other options to consider. Kegel balls or ben wa balls are another popular option that also has great benefits for the health of your pelvic floor, or you could try something like a finger vibe or vibrating panty. These last two are particularly fun as a first time sex toy when you are playing with someone else too. What are the best sex toys for beginners? Finding the best sex toys for beginners is actually an easy task if you know what to look for. Start with a toy for an area that you know you get great pleasure from and start small. At least if a toy is too small you can still use it, whereas if a toy is too big you may struggle to use it properly or even to use it at all. And, no matter what type of toy you start with, make sure you always buy high-quality sex toys. This doesn’t mean you need to buy the most expensive toy out. Check out reviews from customers and make sure you are finding a toy that is body safe and is going to last more than a couple of uses.
The world of sex toys has never been more inviting, inclusive, and destigmatized than right now, offering new possibilities for women and other marginalized identities to explore their sexualities. Or at least, that’s what should be happening in theory. Over the past several years, a wave of feminist sex tech companies has revolutionized the male-dominated industry by redefining toys as part of sexual health rather than an illicit perversity. With groundbreaking products engineered for a wider variety of bodies, shame-free messaging, gorgeously empowering design, and anti-male gaze marketing, companies like Dame, Maude, Crave, and Unbound ushered us into a new era of pleasure tech.
Frequently Asked Questions“We're living through a golden age of sex toys, a kind of a renaissance where we have access to such incredibly well-constructed and innovative products,” said Ian Kerner, a sex counselor, psychotherapist, and author of She Comes First. “We're living through a golden age of sex toys." The trend shows no sign of stopping, either. A 2018 global market report projected the industry would reach $35 billion by 2023, tracing its growth to this repositioning and rebranding, and the public’s overall “increase in openness, drive for excitement and adventure, passion for quirky products and heightened desire for experimentation.”
Culturally speaking, the sex toy stigma grows more extinct by the day. But it hasn't wholly disappeared. “The shame has lessened, but for some women buying a tool exclusively for their own sexual pleasure is still a big leap,” said Hallie Lieberman, author of Buzz: A Stimulating History of the Sex Toy. “A lot of women still don't think that they deserve that or that it will reflect poorly on who they are as a woman.” To be fair to us, counteracting centuries if not millennia of internalized shame from heteronormative patriarchal society is tough. Many of us might not even fully realize where our hesitation to experiment with sex toys really comes from. When sex toy company TENGA’s 2019 Self-Pleasure Report survey asked participants why they didn’t, 49 percent answered with a variety of expected anxieties and shame. But an overwhelming 54 percent simply said it was because they didn’t think they “needed” one. Judging from the well-documented gender disparity in orgasms in heterosexual intercourse, though, it’s clear our notions of who “needs” to (or gets to) feel satisfied in the bedroom is not equal.
“One of the most common reactions to the thought of using sex toys if you haven’t before is, ‘Oh, those aren’t for me.’ At least, that’s the initial thought I had before I owned a vibrator and lubricant,” said Polly Rodriguez, now CEO and co-founder of her own sex toy company, Unbound. (Note: We’re mostly focusing on heterosexual women and couples here because TENGA’s survey and the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior conducted by Indiana University both suggest LGBTQ folks — especially those with labias — are way ahead of the curve, disproportionately making up the demographic already participating in the sex toy revolution. In this rare case, the straights need more help getting past a heteronormative shame. For LGBTQ folks looking for advice, both Unbound's and Dame’s blogs publish fantastic LGBTQ-focused guides.) Mashable Image The Crescendo is designed to fit a variety of bodies and sexual orientations. Scroll to the end for a full review. Credit: Mashable Composite: Mystery Vibe / Bob Al-Greene / Mashable As it turns out, despite years of slut walks and the anti-slut-shaming movement, the fear of being categorized as a hypersexual woman still rears its head. But not wanting to be one of “those” women who “needs” a sex toy goes even deeper than that.
Best Flesh LightIt comes back to the historied, outdated (not to mention heteronormative) belief that women’s pleasure should only come from a man, and that her sexual awakening should happen with him during intercourse. “It’s like, if I have to use this technology to get off, it feels like I’ve failed as a woman,” Lieberman explained. The focus on the phallus as a more “natural” form of female pleasure is why dildos that mimic the male anatomy were such a central focus of the sex toy industry for so long, despite the fact that many other types of toys — like those for clitoral stimulation — were found to be more satisfying to more women. Some of women’s sex toy shame can be blamed on Freud, Kerner said. He incorrectly theorized that clitoral orgasms were an immature state of a woman’s sexual development, with properly functioning females eventually maturing into vaginal orgasms. “He never described how this would happen,” said Kerner. “But there’s still this idea that somehow clitoral orgasms aren’t ‘real’ orgasms.” "If I have to use this technology to get off, it feels like I’ve failed as a woman.” Meanwhile, research suggests 37 percent of people with vaginas need clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm, while only 18 percent said penetration alone was enough. Yet the unrealistic ideals of what women’s pleasure should look like persists, despite being incompatible with how most people with vaginas reach climax.
“What I hear from some women is that introducing a vibrator into sex is an indirect admission that something is wrong, that the intercourse isn’t working. And rather than thinking, ‘Well, there’s probably a good reason for why it isn’t working for me,’ they instead internalize that as feeling sort of broken or defective,” said Kerner. “So you have a lot of women coming in and asking, ‘What's wrong with me? Why can't I get off the normal way?” This unconscious fear is closely tied to another common myth around sex toys: that they’ll replace human (presumably male) partners who can’t satisfy women as well as the technology. SEE ALSO: Why did Tinder make a show about the apocalypse? We drank margaritas and found out. Who can forget the Sex in the City episode when Charlotte needs a “Rabbit intervention” so she can stop getting off so much to her vibrator and go back to being in a real relationship. Lieberman even pointed to this trope being in one of the earliest Greek plays, Lysistrata, where women threaten to replace the men at war with dildos.
In the modern age, the fear that women will become so addicted to toys manifests in memes comparing sex toys to partners, or even Cardi B in Hustlers boasting that her pink vibrator is the best and only boyfriend she will ever need. Mashable Image The Fin is a life-changing partnered sex vibrator. Scroll to the end for a full review. Credit: Mashable Composite: Dame / Bob Al-Greene / Mashable Women in heterosexual relationships still often worry that asking to introduce a vibrator or toy into the bedroom will make their partner feel emasculated. In his work with couples, though, Kerner has never found this to be the case, with “most men seeming very receptive to wanting to create experiences that are mutually pleasurable.” If that’s a particular worry, though, partnered sex toys can alleviate the stress of making it about your pleasure alone.
Flesh LightsThe highly-rated (and also woman co-founded) Crescendo from MysteryVibe is ideal for beginners looking for versatility, designed for solo or partnered play, various positions, and various bodies and sexual orientations, too. For me, something as ingeniously simple, unintimidating, and Intuitive as Dame’s Fin was nothing short of revolutionary, leading to my first simultaneous orgasm with a partner ever. “The new wave of sex toys have opened people up to the idea that toys and masturbation are not in opposition to a relationship. It’s not one or the other. Women don’t have a limited amount of sexual energy,” said Lieberman. Still, the myth of sex toy “addiction” or that vibrators cause permanent desensitization or make it impossible to cum any other way persists. Luckily, there is zero empirical evidence to support these concerns. "Women don’t have a limited amount of sexual energy.” What’s funny, Lieberman noted, is that concerns over vibrators being addictive only started in the 1930s, once sex toys began being openly sold in markets rather than controlled by doctors. That’s when the concept of “dildo attachment” came into the conversation, which claimed to make women stop wanting sex with their husbands.
At worst, Kerner said, vigorous habitual use of a sex toy can simply cause over-familiarity with that specific intense sensation that can’t be replicated by a person. But that’s no different than men who develop difficulty climaxing during intercourse because they masturbate with a very tight grip that can’t be replicated during penetration. Both are easily fixed with a simple break. “Just stop using it for a few days. It’s not heroin. You can put it to the side, and use your hand or go manual with your partner, and it will return to being just as pleasurable,” said Lieberman. One legitimate health concern, however, relates to the type of material used for sex toys. Rodriguez emphasized the importance of medical-grade rather than food-grade silicone, since they often go inside the most absorbent parts of your body. Be very wary of buying anything on Amazon, which often sells knock offs. On the other hand (pun intended), what more masturbation can do is actually improve your capacity to orgasm in general, and give you the space to learn exactly what kind of touch and sensations you like, which you can then communicate to your partner. But outside of its benefits in partnered sex, the power of sex toys is about rediscovering what pleasure means and feels like to you alone. Mashable Image Vibe is one of the cheapest, most beloved beginner toys. Scroll to the end for a full review. Credit: Mashable Composite: Maude / Bob Al-Greene / MASHABLE “I think masturbation is one of the healthiest things we can do when it comes to understanding and appreciating our bodies. For me, and for many in our community, self-pleasure helps us reclaim our bodies for ourselves,” said Rodriguez.
At 21, she underwent menopause after a cancer diagnosis and dealt with feeling estranged from her body. “For many who experience trauma, it can be a truly healing process to redefine your sexuality for yourself.” Another more practical concern for first-time sex toy buyers, found in both the TENGA survey and Unbound’s own community survey, was price. Quality toys can be an investment, and the sheer variety of different types, sensations, and textures can feel paralyzing when you have no reference point for what you like. That’s why the best first toys are reasonably priced, straightforward, and versatile (scroll to the bottom for our best recommendations). People with labias often find the most success when starting with clitoral stimulators like bullets or lipstick vibes. Unbound has a quarterly, affordable subscription box designed for newbies trying to expand their erotic repertoire.
Buy FleshlightsOne revolutionary policy Dame made in order to help get over this barrier to entry goes radically against a key industry-standard: They accept returns. (Unbound accepts partial returns for used toys). “First of all, be proud of yourself for buying the toy.” Their policy changed after CEO Alexandra Fine and her co-founder reevaluated the reasons behind this industry standard, which claims that returns are unhygienic. But the more they thought about it, it became clear that other companies accepted returns despite their product being unhygienic to resell, like Casper mattresses and Thinx panties. “What that kind of policy is almost saying is, ‘Hey, your vagina is disgusting. Obviously, we can’t take returns.’ That in itself has shame built into it, and is counter to us creating a shame-free experience,” said Fine. “We want you to feel comfortable letting us know that something didn't work for you. Then, we can help you find something that does.” Still, even when we can get over all those initial walls of shame and finally buy a sex toy, it’s very normal to then face a whole other wave of shame while actually using it. But there are lots of ways to get past that, too.
“First of all, be proud of yourself for buying the toy,” said Lieberman. “Then, accept that your first few experiences may be awkward. I mean, what was your first experience of sex with another person like? You don’t know what you’re doing. It's a new technology that you're learning. It could even feel weird at first if you've never had something vibrating on your genitals. That's OK, too.” Try everything alone first, and on the lowest power setting first — possibly even over your panties or even a towel for clitoral stimulators. People vary on level of sensitivity. Mashable Image Vesper's a gorgeous necklace/vibrator confronts the sex toy taboo head-on. Scroll to end for a full review. Credit: Mashable Composite: Crave / Bob Al-Greene / MASHABLE Overall, one of the best pieces of advice I ever got while joining the sex toy revolution is to treat each new toy like a new sexual partner. Give yourself time to learn how it fits your body, or whether it’s a good match at all. View your early experiences as exploratory rather than setting the expectation to cum, which puts undue pressure on you and your new friend. And honestly, unless you’ve purchased from one of these new women, femme, and non-binary-led sex toy makers, do your best to ignore the marketing and promises on the packaging. Often, you’ll find images of scantily clad women that project a false picture of what masturbation looks like. In reality, it looks more like you in pajamas and a face mask.
Even more importantly, do not believe in the promises of an instantaneous, guaranteed, melt-your-face off orgasm. Again, every body is different, and it’s normal for something that works for most to not work for you. If you’re confused about how to use it (since many manuals are woefully lacking), educate yourself online with reviews that paint more vivid pictures. Many of the companies that are revolutionizing sex toys also provide well-written blogs and step-by-step guides for their toys. "Me Too let people — especially women — feel more comfortable expressing their need, their demand for sexual pleasure." Underlying the new sex toy revolution is a movement that believes pleasure and satisfaction should be a human right. Closely tied to that movement is another one that started in 2017, which finally allowed women to start talking about the ways sex made them feel ashamed, traumatized, and silenced. “The rise of talking about sexual assault from Me Too let people — especially women — feel more comfortable expressing their need, their demand for sexual pleasure,” said Lieberman. It’s deeply unsettling (perhaps even related) that, in the midst of this sexual wellness revolution, we’re seeing a vicious legal backlash trying to strip women of basic rights over their own bodies. Whether it’s challenges to Roe v. Wade, other increasingly restrictive abortion laws, or less access to birth control, “at the bottom of it all is people preventing women from having sex without consequence. It’s the belief that sexual pleasure isn't good in and of itself for women unless it’s to procreate,” said Lieberman.
While it might seem silly (and obviously, different forms of activism are needed to counteract these serious threats), there is power in reclaiming at least one form of control over your body by exercising your right to pleasure with a toy. “My suggestion is to just give it a try,” said Rodriguez. “I have yet to hear from someone who, after trying a vibrator, regrets it. It’s all about just giving yourself permission to explore — and you are the only one who needs to grant yourself permission, to say ‘yes’ to pleasure. Trust me, you deserve it. We all do.” Maude Minimalist, inexpensive, yet powerful, the Vibe’s exquisitely accessible design made it an instant hit for a reason. Its simplicity doesn’t sacrifice function, with a reputation for getting the job done fast. Able to be used externally or internally, it’s the most bang for your buck (and boy, does that buck go).
Lora DiCarlo Buy Now The Best Sex Toy with a Sense of Humor: Clone-A-Willy If the name “Clone-A-Willy” makes you laugh, good! You have a pulse. It’s completely ridiculous and nothing but fun, so if you want to give this as a gag gift, by all means. But it actually does a pretty good job cloning a willy. Think of all the doors (and orifices) that will open. This stuff is supposed to be fun, remember? When it comes to intimacy with your S.O., dirty talk and mutual self pleasure may be the stars in your playbook. But if you’re in a long-term relationship, you may also be ready to take the current routine to new heights. So, how else can you light up the erotic energy? Sex toys for couples are a good place to start. (Yep, that vibrator stashed in your nightstand for alone time isn't the only way to play.) But opening this proverbial door can feel murky for some couples, whether it's due to lack of experience, nerves, or even shyness. So, how do you, well, begin? "Be patient with each other. Don’t force it,” says certified sex therapist, Jacqueline N. Mendez, LMFT. "Sex toys are about having fun and learning about what feels good to you."
Mendez puts adult toys into six primary categories: vibrators, dildos, anal toys, sleeves, pumps (toys that provide sucking sensations), and packers (aka prosthetics). In the spirit of demystifying couple's play, we're breaking down the best places to start for beginners, starting with the shame-free and sex-positive options from JimmyJane™—the brand on a mission to make sexual wellness fun and empowering. Once you start experimenting, keep the dialogue open and honest with your partner. "It’s easier to talk about sex toys with partners when someone speaks about it from how it helped them feel versus what it is supposed to do—especially if one partner is more experienced than the other," advises Mendez. From there, Mendez says, it’s all about consent—how and where the gadget will be used—whether you're using it as the star of the show or for foreplay. Get ready to turn up the heat with the picks below. RELATED STORIES Make 2022 Your Year for *Self* Love With These Sex-Positive Solo Toys Make 2022 Your Year for *Self* Love With These Sex-Positive Solo Toys This Vibrating C-Ring Is Essential for Anyone Who Struggles To Orgasm From Penetrative Sex This Vibrating C-Ring Is Essential for Anyone Who Struggles To Orgasm From... Keep scrolling and find the best sex toys for couples that will boost your erotic connection, together.
Vibrating Toys SHOP VIBRATING TOYS JimmyJane™ ASCEND 3™ $120 JimmyJane™ DEIMOS™ $125 JimmyJane™ NEPTUNE 2™ $150 According to Mendez, any self-pleasure tool can be a sex toy, and experimenting with these gadgets is part of the fun. "Finding something that works for you during solo play and then bringing your partners in later keeps things fresh," she says. If this brought to mind vibrators (ding ding ding!), here's where to start: The ASCEND 3™, DEIMOS™, and NEPTUNE 2™ are pulsating vibrators that can be used alone or together. If you’re seeking clitoral stimulation (for that, the ASCEND 3™ is your go-to), even more oomph (try DEIMOS™ for max clitoral vibrations), or prostate pleasure (consider NEPTUNE 2™), each well-being toy has intuitive remote controls that can dial up the intensity for a spontaneous surprise. Massage Oils SHOP FOREPLAY
JimmyJane™ HYDRATE MASSAGE OIL $42 JimmyJane™ VELVET SPICE™ $42 Just remember, the orgasmic climax isn’t the only part of an erotic experience. “Everything begins with foreplay,” says Mendez. “Perhaps start with a non-genital area of the body. This would also be a great way to find other erogenous zones in each other.” Heighten the mood with touch before introducing a sex toy into the equation with sensual add-ons like the citrusy HYDRATE MASSAGE OIL™ or aromatic VELVET SPICE™ candle. "Massage oils are a nice way of helping each other relax and begin to play," Mendez notes. Vibrating panties SHOP VIBRATING PANTIES JimmyJane™ STARLA + CALISTA™ $135 JimmyJane™ ASCEND 3 + CARPO $135 JimmyJane™ STARLA + TYRO™ $135 “Keep introducing different parts of your erotic energy to each other,” says Mendez. “You can also discover new ways to play with each other.” If the word "new" piqued your interest, may we suggest you add vibrating panties to your list?
Penis Shrinking EroticaThe JimmyJane™ VIBRATING PANTIES COLLECTION™ combines dressing up (think sheer lace) and sensation play (a silicone vibrator that’s controlled by you or your partner) in one discreet, remote-controlled package. Choose from three styles (an open-back lacy number, a standard cheeky, or a keyhole bikini), and you can pick your vibe... and, ahem, vibrator. Women over 50 often experience more trouble having an orgasm than they did when they were younger. The culprit: lower blood flow to the genitals, combined with diminished production of both testosterone and estrogen. The result: More time is required to climax — or orgasm may not occur at all. Woman holding gift behind her back, Sex toy primer (Kris Ubach and Quim Roser/cultura/Corbis) CORBIS Pepper discusses the most popular types of sex toys and explains how to use them discreetly. Women and their partners can overcome these changes by getting creative.
Vibrators and other gadgets, once viewed as appropriate for solo use only, can dynamically improve a couple's sex play, helping both partners achieve the elusive "Big O." That statement may be news to a minority of readers: A survey conducted by the authors of The Normal Bar (I'm one!) this year found that more than 50 percent of respondents over the age of 50 use sex toys individually or as a couple. The others, I suspect, aren't using them simply because they don't know which ones to try. To fill that knowledge gap (and a few others), here's my decidedly non-prim primer on sex toys: Good vibrations Various iterations of the vibrator, now available in battery-powered or plugged-in models, have been around since the late 19th century. By directly stimulating the nerves, the device helps activate those that are not responding to the usual methods of arousal. Vibrators come in various shapes and sizes — some lifelike. Many models feature adjustable speeds of vibration, a crucial feature for skin that may have become supersensitive over the years. More on Sex 6 myths about vibrators Great sex without intercourse How much do you really know about love and sex? A guy's guide to what women really want
The most famous vibrator is the rabbit, which has been selling briskly ever since Charlotte became addicted to a combination vaginal-clitoral stimulator by that name in Episode 9, Season 1 of Sex and the City in 199 (The clitoral-stimulator portion resembles a pair of bunny ears.) Other popular vibes are the pocket rocket — made for external use, it's four inches long and easy to tuck in a purse — and the G-spot stimulator, a dildo or vibrator that curves up at the end to reach the nerve-rich G-spot on the roof of the vagina. Additionally, there are buzzing and nonbuzzing dildos — penis-shaped objects that can be inserted inside a woman's vagina. Used with a lubricant, these can supplement intercourse, especially if a male partner has inconsistent erections. Put a ring on it Let's say you're a guy and you want to get into the spirit of things; would you consider a penis ring? These are becoming less exotic than they sound; they're often shelved near the condoms in a pharmacy. The ring has a gently expanding band that fits around the base of the penis; a small button activates a vibrator on the ring, positioned to massage the woman's clitoral area during intercourse. So-called "two-headed" versions of the penis ring stimulate both partners simultaneously — sending more blood flowing to the penis.
Cum Slut CollarAnother toy popular with older guys is the C ring; it fits around both the penis and the scrotum, and is donned before an erection to boost the quality and duration thereof. The C ring must be removed after orgasm, lest it cut off circulation and cause serious problems. These gadgets take the pressure off performance. They may also strengthen your relationship: Research shows that trying something new often brings a couple closer together. And did I mention they are fun? The remote-control vibrator, for example, is tailor-made for couples with a sense of humor: The vibrator is sewn into panties and, when activated by remote control, sends quiet vibrations across the clitoral area. A surefire antidote for even the most deadly-dull dinner party! Shop smart Whew, that's a lot of toyful terrain to cover!
For more advice, seek online help from one of the more reputable sites, such as goodvibes.com, loverspackage.com or evesgarden.com. And at specialty stores such as Good Vibrations (San Francisco), Lovers (Phoenix, Seattle, Portland, Ore.), Fascinations (Denver) or Babeland (New York, Seattle), discreet and well-trained personnel are on hand to explain device features; their counsel may keep you from making a mistake — important, given that the better toys tend to be costly. And, as you might imagine, all are nonreturnable! If you've ever peeked inside someone's underwear drawer, chances are you've likely found a sex toy tucked away somewhere in the back corner. Nowadays, sexual well-being and taking control of your own pleasure is at an all-time high, and for good reason. According to certified sex therapist and psychotherapist Lee Phillips, LCSW, CST, CSCT, sex toys can be a tantalizing addition to your sex life because they can add diversity, excitement, and creativity to the bedroom. "Routine sex and masturbation can get boring, so why not spice it up and try something new? Sex toys can help you achieve the orgasm you desire," he tells mbg. "Many of my female clients report this because sex toys provide extra clitoral stimulation."
Whether you're a beginner or a seasoned sex toy enthusiast, it can be tricky looking for the right gadget for your orgasm needs. Fear not: We've done the heavy lifting for you so you don't have to break a sweat (until you want to, that is). We've picked the brains of couples' therapists and sex experts to round up the best sex toys for women and vulva owners. These recommendations will get you offline and into the bedroom for the ultimate plug-and-play pleasure. Quick List: Best for beginners: Satisfyer Pro 2+ Best for couples: Dame Eva Best budget: Lovehoney BASICS Mini Vibrator Best for dual stimulation: Happy Rabbit Realistic Dual Density Rabbit Vibrator Best for discreet use: Crave Vesper Best to simulate oral sex: The Womanizer Pro40 Best for clitoral stimulation: The Magic Wand Best for queer women: Wet for Her’s Two Finger Extender
Gay FleshlightBest for innovation: Lovense Nora How we picked: Expert guidance We asked sex therapists what to look for when searching for the best vibrators and used their expertise as a guideline for selecting these options, and we even included some of their personal recommendations. Body-safe These products are made from body-safe and nontoxic materials, they're safe to use on your body. You can try out these products knowing they're safe for your physical health and pleasure. Inclusive We chose these products from reputable and inclusive sellers who support diversity and the LGBTQ+ community with their product offerings and sexual wellness resources. Good reviews
Through gathering expert recommendations and scouring certified customer reviews, we made sure these sex toy products are highly rated by the people who actually use them. mbg's picks for the best sex toys for women to try in 2022: Best for beginners: Satisfyer Pro 2+ Satisfyer Pro 2+ VIEW ON ADAM & EVE | $67 VIEW ON ENBY | $66 VIEW ON AMAZON | $60 Pro Proprietary air-pulse technology for strong suction Con Can be loud on higher settings Rechargeable: Yes Waterproof: Yes
Sex therapist Aliyah Moore recommends the highly reviewed Satisfyer Pro 2+ to vulva owners who are new to sex toys and looking for an orgasm without penetration. "Instead of the typical vibrations that you get from most clitoral vibrators of massagers, the Satisfyer uses pressure waves to stimulate your clitoris." The intensity levels and waterproof feature lets you have multiple orgasms without having to put anything inside of yourself. The medical silicone mouth on the sex toy provides suction to the clitoris, allowing for a unique pleasure you can feel all over. Best for couples: Dame Eva Dame Eva VIEW ON DAME | $135 VIEW ON ELLA PARADIS | $135 Pro Great addition to partnered sex Con Takes experimentation for the right placement Rechargeable: Yes Waterproof: Yes "[The Eva] is an external-only clitoral stimulator that a clitoris-owner can wear during any type of sex. It's buzzy, on the lighter side, and is great for folks figuring out how to integrate clitoral stimulation during other types of play," relationship and sex therapist Rachel Wright tells mbg. The Eva's slim and compact wearable design allows it to stay in place comfortably while the three-speed motor can reliably get you to orgasm with your partner. Play with it in the bedroom or in the shower; the medical-grade silicone material and waterproof feature allows for fun wherever you want to go.
Estim TortureBest budget: Lovehoney BASICS Mini Vibrator Lovehoney BASICS Mini Vibrator VIEW ON LOVEHONEY | $10 Pro Great value for a basic vibrator Con Vibration may not be powerful enough Rechargeable: No Waterproof: Water-resistant Lovehoney's AA-battery-operated waterproof mini vibrator has an angled tip that helps with direct clitoral and erogeneous zone stimulation during solo and partnered play. The 5-inch vibrator comes with a multi-speed dial for variety with your vibrations while keeping the sound whisper-quiet. The hard plastic ABS materials are latex-free and phthalate-free, meaning it's safe to use on your genitals. Another favorite of Moore's, she recommends the toy as an effective yet budget-friendly option. "It gets the job done for a toy that costs less than your average trip to Starbucks." Best for dual stimulation: Happy Rabbit Realistic Dual Density Rabbit Vibrator Happy Rabbit Realistic Dual Density Rabbit Vibrator
VIEW | $140 VIEW ON BABELAND | $110 Pro Soft and pliable for vaginal or anal use Con Size can be too big for some Rechargeable: Yes Waterproof: Yes Packed with many vibration and pulsation features, the dual rabbit vibrator is made with super-soft dual-density silicone and ABS plastic for safe play. The powerhouse toy has multiple massaging stimulations, like the flickering rabbit ears to tickle the clitoris and a curve on the shaft of the toy to provide pulsations on your G-spot or prostate. Phillips recommends it for any of his clients looking for simultaneous vaginal and clitoral stimulation. Best for discreet use: Crave Vesper Crave Vesper VIEW ON BABELAND | $70
Pro Stylish option when you're on the go Con Charge can wear down over time Rechargeable: Yes Waterproof: Water-resistant If you don't want to keep your sex toys locked away in your nightstand, take the Vesper with you for a night out on the town. Made from high-polish stainless steel, the 3-inch slim pendant shape hangs on a chain around your neck with an intense vibration on the tip for focused clitoral stimulation. "Wear it out and then use it wherever you'd like," Wright recommends. "It's sexy to wear something so out in the open–if you know, you know." Best to simulate oral sex: The Womanizer Pro40 The Womanizer Pro40 VIEW ON LOVEHONEY | $75
Contact UsVIEW | $70 Pro USB charging cable Con Vibration could be stronger Rechargeable: Yes Waterproof: Yes Womanizer's Pleasure Air technology provides clitoral stimulation without direct contact, so you get all the pleasure without overstimulating the nerves. The waterproof toy comes with six intensity levels and hours of battery life. Certified sex therapist Bat Sheva Marcus, Ph.D., MSW, MPH, notes this is a brand she recommends often. "It's not inexpensive, but because the suction needs to be fairly powerful, it's worth paying up for this. Many women say it feels like oral sex. So if you are an oral sex fan, and that gets you off, this one might be for you." Best for clitoral stimulation: The Magic Wand The Magic Wand VIEW ON GOOD VIBRATIONS | $130 VIEW ON AMAZON | $120 Pros Long battery life Plug-in and battery options Cons Bulky size Rechargeable: Yes
Waterproof: No The Magic Wand is known as the little black dress of sex toys. It's so consistent, Marcus recommends every woman should have a wand in their vibrator collection. The rechargeable pick comes with an updated, easy-to-clean silicone head and the same deep, rumbly vibrations for strong orgasms. "It's an all-around massager that works not only on my pleasure zones but also on other parts of my body or my partner's like the back, neck, and shoulders after long travels," Moore says. Best for queer women: Wet for Her's Two Finger Extender Wet for Her's Two Finger Extender VIEW ON WET FOR HER | $40 Pro Can be more comfortable than using a dildo Con Material could be softer for flexibility Rechargeable: N/A
Waterproof: Water-resistant Ideal for G-spot stimulation, the finger extender was ergonomically designed so you could easily slip your two fingers into the toy. The body-safe material lets you feel your muscle contractions and the warmth of your body, so the touch feels natural and super-soft. Good for solo or partnered masturbation, customers rave that the toy is amazing for those who love finger play. Best for innovation: Lovense Nora Lovense Nora VIEW ON AMAZON | $120 VIEW ON LOVENSE | $100 Pro Remote controlled Great for long-distance relationships Con Customers have noted problems with the toy holding a charge Rechargeable: Yes Waterproof: Water-resistant "I have to admit I don't get off from penetration alone, and I know most people don't either. That's where rabbit vibrators with clitoral and internal stimulation come in," Moore notes. The water-safe and body-safe Nora toy has an external vibrating arm to deliver rumbly vibes to the clit while the insertable arm rotates instead of vibrates, which uniquely stimulates your G-spot. So, where does the innovation come in? The technological features. The app-controlled vibrator can be used at close range or far away, which also makes it a great sex toy for long-distance relationships. "You can even sync it to your favorite playlist or your partner's voice," she says.
Tips to keep in mind: See your sexuality as part of your self-care. Sexual self-care is about checking in on your sexual likes, dislikes, and preferences since they can change over time. Being in rhythm with your body and prioritizing pleasure via masturbation allows you to nurture a deeper connection with yourself. Bringing toys into your sexual self-care practice can be a bridge to work through any shame and traverse new sexual ground as well. Get in touch with your body. You can't find the right toy unless you know what makes your body tick. Phillips suggests running through several questions to help you figure out the particular features you'll want with your sex toy: "Is it to spice up your sex life with your partner? Are you not being pleasured enough, and you are tired of using your hands and fingers? Are you having a difficult time achieving an orgasm?" Getting down to the nitty-gritty opens you up to explore your pleasure zones and the type of touch you would prefer, which narrows down your choices.
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